" Oh, my God!" I laugh. "He totally sounded like that! What was I thinking?” I sit down on the stool in front of the dressing table and lay her dress across my lap.“Oh, probably the same thing you always do when you set out to shag the nearest penis with a heartbeat, you slag.” She glares down at me with her hands on her hips. “Absolutely nothing.”The door crashes open to admit a towering Australian into the dressing room. “Today’s stuck-up English wedding brought to you by Spanks,” Will announces, smacking Ashley hard on her backside.Ashley yelps and jumps a full foot into the air. Landing, she backhands Will with a hard slap on his chest. “You shit!” she growls.“You can’t go around smacking brides on their wedding day!” I demand up at him. Why does he have to do tall, dark and handsome so well? God! And in that suit…“Hey, that’s what they said at the Johnston wedding across the hall,” Will replies, looking around the room and helping himself to a handful of chocolates. Then freezing. Placing a kiss on the back of her petite hand I told her in my best French accent, "Sandy, your royal highness, today I am but your humble servant, here to grant your every wish no mater how slight. If you will be so kind as to allow me to escort you, your chariot awaits. Shall we proceed?" She looked up at her mom with a WOW expression and said to me "Sure let's go." Grabbing her dress on a hanger and her overnight bag, I gave her my arm and led her to my car. I opened the passenger side door and helped her into the seat. Coming around to the driver's side I slid in and buckled up. As I started the car she asked me "Where are you taking me?" Sandy my princess," I replied, "Today is your special day. Every place we go and everything we do is all about you and only you. So relax and, in a word, enjoy." We pulled out and headed to our first stop. We got out and went into Madam Bevier's House of Beauty. The receptionist met us at the door. I said to the lady "I am pleased to introduce.
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